One instructor / caregiver gave this information to some training with nurses and other caregivers:
The patient: White female. She neither speaks nor comprehends the spoken word. Sometimes she babbles incoherently for hours on end. She is disoriented about person, place and time. I have worked with her for six months but she still does not recognize me. She shows a complete disregard for physical appearance and makes no effort to assist in her own care. She must be fed, bathed and clothed by others. She is toothless so her food must be pureed. Her sleep pattern is erratic. Often she awakens in the middle of the night… Most of the time she is friendly and quite happy. Several times a day, however, she becomes quite agitated without apparent cause and screams loudly, until someone comes to comfort her.
After this presentation, the nurses were asked how they would feel about taking care of such a patient. Words such as ‘frustrated’, ‘depressed’, ‘annoyed’ were used. The lecturer said he enjoyed the care of her and was greeted with disbelief. A picture of the patient was then passed around…it was his six-month-old daughter. (from “A Guide to the Spiritual Dimension of Care for People with Alzheimer’s Disease and Related Dementia” by Eileen Shammy – 2003 – p. 34)
Why is it more difficult to care for an 80-year-old with identical needs… isn’t it our attitude and perspective? Sure we can say we have a hope that our little daughter will grow, learn and mature. But why should that have an effect on how I care for her right NOW! Those with dementia only have the NOW – they have a jumbled memory of the past – not much outlook for the future – they only have the NOW and that is where we care and minister to them – RIGHT NOW!
Some friends and loved ones you visit you can talk about future plans – what they are learning and enjoying – but many of those with dementia you cannot.
Attitude is everything!